Little guy, SIT STILL.

September 3rd, 2010

Hummingbirds are lovely.  But, man oh man, can you say ADHD?

I’ve been trying to get a decent picture of these little humming buggers for days now.

A few nights ago, I put my digital camera on continuous shooting mode and shot away at the hummingbird feasting on our $.74 cent plastic feeder.

I held down the snap-a-picture button (that’s it’s technical name) and it snapped away at like 3 pictures per second for twenty seconds or so.  SweetGuy complained about how much film I was wasting.

And, these were the best of the bunch.

I’ll keep trying.  We absolutely adore these little guys.  And, I’m already getting depressed at the fact we soon won’t be able to sit out in the gazebo and watch them flit about like ping pong balls.

Horsing Around

August 28th, 2010

The family went to Arlington Race Track today in order to eat too much, laugh even more, lose a bit of money, and celebrate Mom’s birthday.  I’m 46 years old and the youngest of four children.  Do the math:  Mom is 39.

We’ve had a mini-tradition in the past of going to Arlington for Mom’s birthday.  But, the tradition seems very different now.  For one, this is the first time we have gone without Dad.  Two, our children, the next generation, have joined us for the first time.  In regards to Dad, it was acutely different being there without him.  But, to her credit, Mom placed bets on Dad’s behalf every single race.  And he didn’t win a once.  You’d think he’d have better connections by now.

My brother, Favorite Child, is entirely unpleasant.  He gave Mom a bag of 100 golden dollar coins for her birthday.  I gave her a two-for-a-dollar bag of chocolate covered peanuts.  On the surface, his present looks a little better.  But, consider this little fact and decide for yourself:  she saved the peanuts and took them home with her, but she just kept giving the golden dollars away.  Her favorite is obvious, no?

It was a BEAUTIFUL, almost perfect day.  Dangit, Dad, if you could have just come through with one long-shot, the day WOULD have been perfect.  Man, get busy networking, and we expect better of you next year.  Despite that, myself and our siblings, our spouses, and our children know that we have won the lottery in terms of family.  And Mom deserves all the credit.

Happy Birthday to the coolest 39-year-old ever!!!!   You are loved, Mom.  You are loved.

Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

August 25th, 2010

Having the kids home for the summer equals a raucous, joyous, LOUD, party with your best friends.  Parties are hilarious, and spontaneous, and make for great memories.  They also cause you to stay up too late and make a mess in your house.  But, who cares, right?  The party is so worth it.

Having kids leave after the summer equals easing into the hammock with a tall iced tea and a book that’s tough to put down.  No mess, no noise, and a good excuse for a nap.

Both are wonderful.

Bud moved first.  Not back to school, but into his own place.  The good news here is that he is close by and we will see him often.  The bad news is… give me a minute here.  Um, the bad news is… oh, look, SQUIRREL!

Oh, heck, we’re going to miss the guy.  But, we’re just so proud of what he’s accomplished, and it doesn’t hurt that he is now completely self sufficient and has a totally cool 55″ TV that we can go drool over anytime we like.  I knight thee HULKAVISION.

And, most importantly, Bud has a Wii.  I have a Wii.  He has Mario Kart.  I just bought my own copy of Mario Kart, my dear Mario Kart.  Bud may have escaped the family home, but he cannot escape my Mario Kart obsession.  Sorry, dude, you can take the boy out of the family home, but you can’t take the Mario Kart obsession and network connection out of the Mom.  Or something like that.

BTW, here’s a quick shout out to everyone who has helped Bud get his new place ready.  DustMeister was invaluable helping move and putting things together (read:  the  ALL IMPORTANT entertainment center, holder of the HULKAVISION.  And, Singing Sally is Bud’s own personal Martha Stewart.  Were Bud to be left to his own decorating devices, his living room would consist of plastic tubs, a duct taped office chair, a lava lamp, and the HULKAVISION.

Oh, hey, I recall someone else moved out too.  Look, thanks to AUBS and DustMeister (that guy’s making himself valuable – I suspect he wants something), Magoo has a new home too:

Quick story.  DustMeister was in charge of setting up Magoo’s computer and speakers.  He immediately went about installing all security updates on her laptop.  She immediately went about yelling at him for doing so.  I totally had his back and explained installing updates was THE SMART THING TO DO.

Two days later, her laptop blew up completely and even though Windows would not boot, it was nice enough to explain to her that it refused to ever work again because of a recently installed SECURITY UPDATE.   I hate it when non-nerds are “proven” right when they are so OBVIOUSLY WRONG.

But, we nerds can have our sweet final laugh.

With the help of a kind neighbor geek of Magoo’s, her laptop was repaired last night.  Yet, she called me this morning saying her wired Internet connection still wasn’t working.  I explained to her she’d have to ask kind-geek-neighbor to help her again, and that he’d probably need to install a wired network card driver, blah, blah, blah.

Here is a text conversation Magoo and I had tonight:

Magoo:  ”COMPUTER IS ALIVE”

Me:  ”Yay!  What did you do?”

Magoo:  ”Erick came over and clicked the Internet button and it worked.  And then I yelled at him for a while.”

Me:  ”Oh dear, somewhere out there is a geeky girl born on your birthday at the same hospital you were born at who is missing her real parents.”

Magoo:  ”Oh, shut up.  It seriously didn’t work for me.”

Me:  ”Uh huh.”

SweetGuy and I LOVED this summer.  And, we are sorry it has come to an end.  But, we shall console ourselves with a tall iced tea and a nap amidst our sorry.

OK

August 22nd, 2010

Two weekends ago, we accomplished a somewhat spontaneous trip to Oklahoma to meet Sweet Family.  Our niece, The White Rose, goes to school in Tulsa and even though the drive was a chore, and our short time flew, the trip was well worth it.

I try not to divulge too much personally identifiable information on this blog, so I shall not tell you where The White Rose goes to school.  I shall never say, so don’t try to get it out of me.

Quite often I look back on pictures I’ve snapped and enjoy reliving the moment and the situation.  Such as this photo.  Um, well, I guess not.  I have no idea what is happening here.  But, it makes me laugh.

These kids have been close since their early childhood days when they were moronically obsessed with Pokemon and beanie babies.  They are now 22, 20, 19, and 16 and are perhaps closer than ever.  Grateful,  we are.

Let me REFLECT upon Little Couz for a moment:

Sweet Family drove from Texas.  We drove from Illinois.  We left after work Friday night, drove 9 hours, spent the day together on Saturday, had breakfast together on Sunday, and drove 9 hours back.  18 hours on the rode in order to enjoy less than 18 waking hours together.

It was well worth it.

Life is about relationships and even in the era of extensive opportunities for electronic forms of communication, nothing beats sitting around a picnic table outside Sonic, slurping root beer floats, laughing and telling stories, oblivious to the descent of the sun and the ticking of the clock.

Now that we’ve done the navigational math, and figured out Tulsa is halfway between us and them, I hope the moons line up and we can meet again.

But, you know, they could just move back to Illinois and save us all a few miles.  Seems like an obvious solution to me.

Cincy Indy Day 4

August 12th, 2010

I shall put you out of your misery very soon.  Our vacation lasted a total of four days, so after this post, NO MORE VACATION POSTS.  Until the next one.

Indianapolis is a lovely city.  It has a clean, nicely maintained river walk, well technically a canal walk, that snakes around for a few miles.  We set out early on our canal walk journey.

 

Has anyone else ever noticed that Magoo has attitude 24/7?

 

Also, has anyone ever noticed that Bud is the most laid back human being EVER?

 

As we were ending our couple hours of walking, SweetGuy and I spotted a little trailer advertising Segway tours.  Earlier while we were in Cincinnati, Magoo had been chirping consistently about trying a Segway tour, but we could never get in touch with the one advertised there.   We, namely her parents, weren’t exactly upset about this since we knew it would be expensive, and as evidenced by our choice of vacation destinations, we were trying to do this whole thing on the cheap.  Back to our Indy walk, SweetGuy and I just kept walking past the Segway Trailer and none of the kids noticed it.  WIN!

Fail, actually.  We couldn’t keep up the deception.  On top of that, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I WANTED TO RIDE A SEGWAY.  SweetGuy, being sweet of course, against his prevailing financial mindset, said “Let’s do it.”  And we did.

And it was S O   M U C H   F U N.  After a quick riding tutorial we were off on our tour of Indianapolis.  Here we are below with our tour director.  He was actually a friendly guy, but look how surly he is in this picture.  I’m getting a complex wondering if in actuality he didn’t like us.  WHAT?  Not possible.  We are so much fun to be around.  Just ask us.

Not to mention that if your job is to ride Segways in the sunshine all day long, there’s no reason to make a pouty face.

 

I took pictures while riding on the Segway.  Snapping photos while moving on a vehicle you learned to operate in the previous 30 minutes while navigating people, objects, and bodies of water is not the easiest (or intelligent) move ever.  Thus, I just snapped away without actually looking through the viewfinder.  So I shall spare this post the 147 pictures that are cockeyed and focused on the lower third of a tree trunk.   

 

Magoo declared herself the official Segway Tour Model.  Bud didn’t.  He was putting his surly on rather well himself.

 

The tour would pause from time to time for our guide to tell us interesting facts about Indy.  I bet they were interesting, but as we were all taking the tour while riding the COOLEST PERSONAL TRANSPORTATION DEVICE EVER, we didn’t so much pay attention to him.  Rather, we were spinning in circles, or rocking back and forth, or trying to not spin in circles or rock back and forth.  We were so distracted by the toy.  Maybe that’s why our guide was surly.

 

It was pricey, but every one of us loved experiencing the Segway.  Better yet, I get to cross it off my life list.

We spent our final afternoon napping, and shopping.  Most of us (not named Magoo) are not into shopping very much, but we have a specific reason for shopping on vacation.  Years ago we created a tradition whereas we cash in our coin jar before leaving on vacation, split the proceeds among us, and draw names to buy presents for each other.  I don’t remember when or why we started this tradition.  I suspect it had something to do with trying to limit the kids asking for stuff while we were on vacation.  Whatever the reason, we’ve had a blast with it over the years and this time we were able to introduce The White Rose to our tradition.

Bud had her name.  And all he bought were presents for Flat Couz:

 

SweetGuy was perkily pleased with the hat Magoo purchased:

 

He’s just a little less perky in the following picture, which is of course why I included it.  His look cracks me up.  This is his “I’m hungry and why on earth are we not moving towards the restaurant, YET AGAIN.”

 

We headed towards dinner in an artsy section of the city, where Flat Couz was nearly mauled by a parrot in need of a little anger management counseling.

 

Magoo hijacks my attempt at an artsy photo.  She’s just so very helpful sometimes.

 

We ended up at a dark, old German restaurant oozing with personality.  The White Rose was delighted to see the Vegetarian Section on the menu, up until noting the details of the section essentialy offering a single vegetarian plate consisting of your choice of four items from the appetizer menu – oh, and pick the ones not including meat. 

 

And, what good is a German restaurant if it doesn’t include a little Polka in the street afterwards!  It’s a good thing SweetGuy had gotten a little something in his stomach by this point, or he would have been none too pleased by yet another pause in our attempt to reach a destination.  Have you ever taken a walk with a toddler?  They pause to twirl around, they pause to pick up a rock, they pause to examine a shiny object.  Exactly like taking a walk with these girls: 

 

We’re OK with that though, because after all life is about the journey, not just the destination.

And our midwestern city journey this year was better than the best.  THE END.

Indy or Bust

August 8th, 2010

On to bigger and better things for Day 3:  Indianapolis.

But, first, we needed sustenance at a sunny little breakfast joint called “First Watch” in Cincy.  I HIGHLY recommend this place.  I have no pictures of the place (shocking) but it’s bright and colorful and I’m certain it would be almost impossible to be unhappy there.

Next, a little dirve, and onto the Children’s Museum in Indianapolis. And, as you’ll soon see, I’m VERY glad that school was still in session for most children.  Thus, the museum was almost deserted.  Otherwise I might have been a bit embarrassed at the antics of our own “children.”

 

Bud and I saw this dinosaur puzzle and scoffed.  Ha, we could probably put that thing together, in what, 10 seconds.  Here, let’s try.  Yeah, it took us a lot longer than that.  Then we called Magoo and The White Rose over to show them how misleadingly difficult it was.  And, they put it together in like 10 seconds.  Children.

 

Oh, the sheer joy we felt at the opportunity to work the world’s largest etch-a-sketch (notice Flat Couz on one of the knobs in the picture).  Only to have our joy turn to utter disappointment realizing it was broken.  An opportunity lost forever.

 

The girls recalled visiting this same museum years ago and getting the chance to play dress-up.  They were excited to re-live their memories only to find out the area they remembered was for four year old or younger.  Alas, they did find an area that allowed them to dress up and walk the runway.  It was difficult to find things that fit, and they did have to shove a little boy in a skirt out of the way to get to the good stuff.  Eventually, they got to strut their stuff:

 

Oh, Flat Couz, use a napkin next time, will you?

 

The hall of mirrors.  Magoo managed to hold it together.

 

So, the girls insisted on riding the carousel.  The other riders consisted of mothers, grandmothers, and children under three.  Our girls sort of stood out.  Particularly when they swung around over and over again hamming and weirding it up for the camera, only to realize too late that the camera they were directing all their oddness to belonged to some stranger.  A stranger who quickly gathered his children and backed away.

 

Did I mention already that I was glad there were not many young children around?  Imagine your three year old encountering these giant creatures within the dark tunnels of the forest maze.  They’d need counseling.

 

The kids built this arch, then proceeded to smash it.  Magoo punched one of those pieces into the back wall with a thundering WHAP.  This was about the fourth time during our visit that I quickly looked around and expected to be tossed out of the place.

 

This is one of the coolest places around. 

 

 

After terrorizing the Children’s Museum, we headed downtown.

We at at P.F. Chang’s and ended our day checking into our hotel.  I’d somehow scored two awesome, huge corner suites for our stay.  We didn’t pay that much for them, and I honestly think someone made a mistake giving them to us, but who were we to complain.

Well, that is until SweetGuy and I realized the kids were staying in the suite directly above us and decided to communicate with us by stomping on the floor.  No, stomping isn’t accurate, STOMPING is more accurate.  SASQUATCHING above our room in order to let us know they were ready for dinner.

Lovely.

 

Tomorrow:  checking another item off the lifelist.

Vacation 2010 Day 2

August 6th, 2010

Here’s our niece, The White Rose’s interpretation of Day 2 of our luxurious journey to Cincinnati:

 

Confused?  It will make sense in a moment.  For this day, we decided to be a bit more cultured… what am I saying, it would be difficult to be less cultured than us.  Anyway, in an attempt at increased culturivity on day 2, we visited the Krohn Conservatory.  Where Professor Plum killed Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick.  Oops, the cultureness didn’t last long.  Anyway, we visited a conservatory where Flat Couz conquered Mt. Fuji.  She’s impressive, isn’t she?

 

 

Oh, and there was a butterfly exhibit.  All of it was quite pretty and we really did enjoy it, save for the fact the conservatory not only housed butterflies and plants, it was also an experimental station for testing human endurance in extreme heat and extreme EXTREME humidity.  Our test group lasted about 30 minutes.

 

I felt the need to include this picture in order to document just how weird my fellow cultured travelers are.  If I were a cleverer sort, I’d make up a story to illustrate the three very different expressions in this picture below.  As it is, I have no idea what was going on but looking at each of those faces makes me laugh every time.

 

Look.  MORE CULTURE.  We went to an art museum.  It was huge and beautiful and cavernous with dozens of big, warm rooms each holding enough art to fill up about 1% of the room.  Bud and I, in our sophisticated way, soon began concocting an elaborate fantasy of attaching the art museum to a Sams Club and then closing it all off to the public and making it our home forever.  We’d move giant screen TVs, trampolines, and hot tubs into the big pretty building.  We’d race go carts through the halls, all the while taking in the beauty of the artistry surrounding us.  Would that not be the COOLEST THING EVER?

 

Spooooooky.  Thank you, Flat Couz, for your proper hand sanitation. 

 

Later on day 2, with our connections we managed to nab absolute back row tickets to “Legally Blonde – The Musical.”   The picture below is not very good but I included it to 1) prove the back row story and 2) be a rebel.  I got in trouble about 3 seconds after this photo was snapped.  Sooo, I guess you’re not supposed to take pictures in the theatre.  My bad.  (BTW, the reference to “Omigod” in the illustration at the top of the post is from the musical.  The first number is absolutely hilarious and catchy.  Warning:  once this song is in your head, it will never leave you for the rest of your life. )

 

But, wait, the day is not over.  We wound down the evening with desserts and a little Uno in the hotel restaurant.  Note the reference from The White Rose’s illustration at the top.  Flat Couz was a tough competitor, but we managed to take her 2 out of 3.

 

Let me tell you a story.  Magoo went up to the room to change her clothes.  As she came back to the elevator by herself, she noticed something off to the side of the elevator.  A little nervous, she peeked around the corner.  In the exact same moment of the ding of the arriving elevator she was absolutely startled by another person IN HER FACE!  The shock was real and extreme.  Until, she realized she was staring at herself in a mirror. 

Being the kind souls we are, we had to re-create the moment and take a picture of the reflection.  Magoo did not fully cooperate with our reenactment. 

 

I’m thinking she wasn’t too pleased with our theatrics.  We love her.  She definitely keeps us all entertained.

 

There you have it for Day 2.  Are these posts sort of like being forced to watch someone’s vacation slideshow?   Oh well, I have two more days of vacation to recount still.  If nothing else, I want to get it on here so I can remember it, and so that Flat Couz can see how much fun she had!

Vacation 2010

August 4th, 2010

We recently received a fabulously funny thank you note from our most excellent niece, The White Rose.  She was thanking us for taking her along on our family vacation this year.  No joke, we should really be thanking her because she added so much fun to the trip.

She captured some of the moments SO well, they did actually make us laugh out loud.

So, using the various images on her card, I’m going to take a few posts to recount our vacation adventure.  Here goes.

 

On a fine Saturday in May we set forth on our trendy, luxurious, decadent getaway to:

 

CINCINNATI

 

Don’t be jealous.  It’s unbecoming.

We work hard for our money and earned the right to go to a nondescript Midwestern city, dadgummit!

We arrived at our destination and set out to Cincy’s Fountain Square, where they were having an African-American Festival.

 

I believe I neglected to mention that not only did The White Rose join us on this journey, but little sister, who we shall call Flat Couz, joined us as well.  Um, kind of.  She was sort of a pain though.  She ate all her sister’s ice cream.  She eats a LOT actually.  It’s amazing she stays so thin.

 

We walked down to the river where we observed many WWF fans waiting outside an arena for their favorite wrestlers to show up.  Let’s just say we felt a bit out of our element.  But, we tried to act all WWF like so as not to raise suspicion.  I put SweetGuy into a Doomsday Deathstar Spiral Chokehold Hammerlock and we fit right in.

Then we observed an odd steam pipe/musical device. 

 

Oh, look across the river.  It’s another state.  Hey there, Kentucky.

 

Flat Couz enjoyed the steam thing. 

 

Being the adventurers we are, we walked to Kentucky.  And, then needed a little refreshment and Irish fixings.

 

Flat Couz didn’t partake of the beer, though she barely took no for an answer.  She, did enjoy a little Shepherd’s Pie.

 

Flat Couz, this is what will happen to you if you partake of the beer.  You’ve been warned.

 

Flat Couz insisted on seeing a movie in 3-D at an IMAX in Kentucky.  Oooh, pricey.  Good movie.  But IMAX=overrated.

 

I did mention we were trendy, didn’t I?

 

And, on to our first illustration:

 

There’s a bridge called The Purple People Bridge spanning from Ohio to Kentucky, and back TOO.  Guess what?  It’s purple and it’s meant for people to traverse it.   However, we were quite bothered by the fact it wasn’t so much purple, as light lavender. 

Look, standing in two states at one time!  Crazy, I know, right.  That’s us.

 

Cincy:

 

Bud, always the rebel, walked on a different side of the Purple People Bridge.  

 

And, speaking of rebel:

That girl was uncontrollable. 

To be continued…

 

 

.

nap tractor beam

July 27th, 2010

… it sucked her right in.

Once the nap tractor beam has you in its grips, there is no escape.  So why even try.

There we were, the two of us (and the cat) discussing the copious list of things she needed to get done on Sunday in order to get ready for her fast approaching trip to work at a camp on Chesapeake Bay.  The list was long, and the time was short.

Soon, she looked at me and said “The absolute only thing I can think about at this moment is a nap.”

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt-snaaaaaaaaap.   Tractor beam engaged.

She toppled over and was out of it.

I know better than to try to fight her naps.  It’s best to give in, because eventually they always triumph.  So I went back to painting the gazebo and taking a few pictures.

Yes, I positioned the ladder above her and took a picture.  She has no idea I did this.  If napping were an Olympic sport, we’d all be rich off this girl’s endorsements.

Why Illinois?

July 20th, 2010

Here’s a photo from our backyard a few nights ago:

I OFTEN wonder why we choose to live in Illinois.  The weather is either too hot/humid or too cold with very few in-between days.  It’s either too wet or too dry, and rarely just right.  Storms cause damage to our trees and barns on what seems like a monthly schedule.  I’m down on Illinois so I think I need to take stock of what is good and make a list of why we live here.  Here goes:

  • Reason #1)  The sky is pretty.
  • Reason #2)  Family & Friends live here.
  • Reason #3)  See Reason #2.

I’m spent.  That’s all I’ve got.

Plain and simple (speaking of Illinois!), we live here because the folks we care about live here.  Well, mostly.  There’s a few rogues living in other parts of the country and the world, but we all know they WISH they lived near us. 

Boy oh boy, do I wish we could just up and move ourselves and EVERYONE we care about to a more excellent location.  Colorado is my personal choice.  Healthy, beautiful, clean-living, 300 days of sunshine a year… Illinois, let’s be honest, you can’t hold a candle to Colorado.

I know this fantasy isn’t going to take place.  I guess we’ll just continue to admire the pretty clouds and stifling humidity amongst friends.

And, who am I kidding anyway.  Magoo hates it when we change ANYTHING around the house.  If we were to actually talk of moving to another state she would vault into spastic flails of despair.  I changed out a broken doorknob on the garage door a few days ago.  It’s been dented and rusty since we moved into the house ten years ago.  Oh, and it would only turn one way, and often not latch.  And, we had no key to it, thus could not lock it.  The thing finally kicked the bucket a few days ago and refused to turn at all.  I spent $18.76 and ten minutes replacing it with a lovely brushed nickel replacement that turns and locks and everything!

Magoo was not pleased.  She misses the old doorknob.

Who am I kidding.  Illinois, you’re stuck with us.