I HATE to admit it, but FavoriteChild and his partner, Dave, do have a FEW good qualities.

One of them is generosity.

They have seven nieces/nephews and are providing every single one of them with partial college scholarships.  They may not want me to divulge too much about this subject, so I won’t.

However, Bud’s recent college graduation also brought about the end to our tuition payments for him!!  Can you hear the angels singing?  I can.

Thus, it seemed to be the appropriate time for a rip-roaring thank you to Dave and FavoriteChild.  But, there’s a problem with this scenario.  There really is no adequate thank you possible.

So, we decided to go for quirky and memorable.  And, stupid.  These are the things we do best.

To be included with a Thank You note, Magoo and Bud decided to illustrate in photo form who Bud is WITH the scholarship, and who Bud might be WITHOUT the scholarship:

WITH:

WITHOUT:

All I can say is, seeing these accurately depicted photos, helps me appreciate the value of a good education.

Sharp-dressed Bud can now get a job, and become a productive member of society.  That college degree can, and in fact WILL purchase him a whole lotta mac-n-cheese.

And out-of-work Bud?  Dude, please make your way to the free dental clinic.  Quickly.  I’ll even give you bus fare.  (On second though, no I won’t.  All you’ll do is buy mac-n-cheese with it.)

I’d like to see THIS post title get some search engine hits!  Who would search for such a thing?

Anyhow, Bud had his wisdom teeth extracted today.  Extraction isn’t necessarily a pretty word, but it’s a lot more pleasant sounding than say cut, and yanked, and REMOVED WITH EXTREME FORCE AND UNPLEASANT TOOLS.

As always, he was his even-keeled self.

Though, he was a bit loopy directly after the procedure and all the drugs caused him to be not shy at all.  He was joking with the nurse and the doctor.  Of course, they couldn’t understand a word he said, but they smiled approvingly.

Directly after the procedure he and I had to wait at Walgreen’s for some time for his prescriptions.  It was a long enough wait that his gauze needed switching out.  As I removed his gauze, I noted there was a lot of blood.

Bud replied, “You should see the other guy.”

Kid should be anesthetized all the time.  It improves his funny.

Here is chipmunk cheeks himself:

After feeding Bud some mashed potatoes and pudding for supper, I turned into a bit of a tyrant.  Things went kind of like this:

Me:  “Bud, it’s time for your vicodin”

Bud:  “OK”  (he swallows the pill)

Me:  “Now, listen up.  In exactly 30 minutes you and I are going to go head to head in my favorite driving game, Mario Kart, the one in which you always win.  I believe it’s my time.  I feel the zone coming on.”

Bud:  “OK”

Bud:  “So what are the side effects of these pills?”

Me:  “Well, it does say you might get dizzy and drowsy.  Oh, and that you definitely shouldn’t drive.”

Me:  “bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha”

Bud:  shakes head.

30 minutes later, he lays on the couch with his eyes closed, muttering something about pain and swelling, and proceeds to whoop me in Mario Kart without ever actually lifting his head off the pillow.

Would it be wrong to give him vicodin, vodka, and spin him around a few times?  Then ask for a rematch?

Zack, AKA Bud, and I have an interesting relationship.  I think this little picture sums it up nicely: last night around 2AM we were relaxing upstairs before going to bed.  He had decided that he was calling it a night, and I knew that I should follow in his footsteps.  However, the thought of getting up off the couch to move to bed was a tragic one.  Zack knew this and offered to help me up.  I of course declined and proceeded to whine about my terrible predicament.  After a few minutes of this he gave up and started heading to his room.  At this point I decided that I not only wanted his help up, but I also wanted him to turn off the TV.  So what does he do???  He does exactly what I demand of him without a fuss.  How many brothers in this world would actually do that????  Answer: not many.

Here’s who Zack used to be: a skinny skinny little kid who spent his day jumping around the yard with his power ranger guns and pretending that the ground was lava so that traveling across the swing set was the only way to avoid utter annihilation.  A good portion of his time and energy was spent pressing every single one of my buttons over and over again and then telling Mom that I was the one who was overreacting.  He was a kid who went to bed at 7:00 every Christmas Eve and then laid there trying to somehow contain his excitement for the following five hours until he could fall asleep.  He was the obnoxious little kid who “couldn’t pronounce” Emily’s name, and therefore was left with the only option of calling her “Enemy”.  Another quality of little Zack is that he very rarely got angry at anyone or any thing (sans video games that weren’t working).  I remember one time that Zack, Mom, and I were around a campfire in our backyard.  We each had our own sticks to poke the fire with (wouldn’t have it any other way).  Being pretty little, I accidentally poked Zack in the face with my stick instead of the fire.  Needless to say Mom was not too pleased, but Zack hardly even got angry at me.   He was fine, so in his mind it was no harm, no foul.

Please don’t get me wrong, he was a psycho too.  But that’s a whole other blog post.

Zack and I haven’t exactly had the happiest and strongest relationship for our whole lives.  There have definitely been times where I would choose to have him shipped off to Siberia in a heartbeat, and I’m sure Zack could say the same about me.  But I think recently more than ever I have come to realize what a cool brother I have been blessed with.  A perfect example of this has been our last couple weeks of school.  Very nearly every single night we had a Skype chat conversation that essentially consisted of us asking each other how late we were going to be up that night trying to get done everything that needed to be done.  At least two of the conversations lasted until 4 in the morning, and one went entirely through the night until about 8:00 AM.  That boy was as busy as you could be, and he still made sure to ask about my stress levels and offer support when it was desperately needed.  Not only this, but he even offered to help my nerdy friends with their computer based homework when he really didn’t  have much time to spare.  Basically if I had to sum Zack up in a few words it would be (without a doubt), generous and stable.

Here’s another way to describe him now: A COLLEGE GRADUATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah that’s right, it’s pretty freaky

But he is, he did it, and he deserves it… probably more than anyone I know.  He’s a good kid… excuse me, he’s a good man.  Zack has worked hard and now he’s beginning the next part of his life on the right foot.  This summer he will get a real job and an apartment, and oh my goodness is that going to be amazing/scary/cool/exciting/unbelievable.  And because I’m the little sister I have no doubt that his apartment will be crashed and used for some late night game playing.  He doesn’t have much choice in the matter.

But here’s the point of everything.  Zack has graduated college.  He graduated COLLEGE.  He GRADUATED COLLEGE.  I’m not completely sure it has hit him yet, or even that it has it the rest of us either.  But it will, and then we will have a moment of sadness when we realize that a chapter of all of our lives has ended in a way.  But it will quickly be overshadowed by the excitement that the future will bring.  And believe me when I say, the future is a bright one for Zack, my brother, the college graduate.

One of the things I love about Bud is that he’s a fan of simple pleasures. He doesn’t yearn for much, simply because he’s happy with what he has. The guy will have his own apartment pretty soon. I’m already planning on taking on an alter ego super hero form – the decorating fairy – sneaking in while he’s sleeping and hanging a picture one night, laying a rug the next, replacing his single plastic plate and bowl with a set of cheap dishes that will at least match. He’ll never figure it out.

Have I mentioned that outside of his tuition and room & board, he spends about $12/month?

But, one thing he CANNOT live without is having something to keep his hands busy. Thankfully, this is a very cheap hobby.

Whenever we Skype, it’s evident his hands are always moving. On one of our recent calls, I asked him to show me what he had around him. And, being the consistently evil person I am, I snapped pictures without his knowledge.

A blue rubber worm, paperclip necklace, deck of cards, class ring, and toy truck. What more does a guy need?

Tte decorating fairy is already devising a plan for sneaking the rubber worm and the paperclip necklace into the garbage can.

I shall replace them with a decorative air freshener and a potted plant.

I shall be a ninja stealth decorating fairy.  Bud will never know.

It’s November.  No one ever accused me of being timely.   When our nest started emptying in August I knew I wanted to post about the process of each child departing.  So yeah, I already wrote about DustMeister leaving and about Magoo leaving. 

Let’s see, I think there was one more…

Don’t tell me.  It will come to me. 

Oh YES – who’s the MAN – I remember!!  Bud.  The first born.  He’s quiet, you know.  I can’t be expected to IMMEDIATELY remember everyone I’ve given birth to, can I?

So, Bud, was the next to go. 

Singing Sally and I made the trip to SIUE to drop off AUBS! and the Bud-man.  He’s a Senior so he’s got the moving into college routine down, right.

We found his apartment, unloaded his stuff, and offered to help him unpack and cozy up his place a bit.  He gladly took us up on the offer.  I don’t think I was 30 seconds into unpacking when I inquired “Bud, you did bring bedding, right?”

Bud:  “Oops”

Me:  “Sheets… blankets… anything?”

Bud:  “Not so much”

Me:  “What other essentials have you forgotten?”

Bud:  “I have my laptop, my X-box, my phone, and all associated power cords.  So see, I have forgotten no other essentials.”

Me:  “I have a headache.”

Sally and I gussied up his room as much as possible with one poster and a thumbtack.

We meticulously organized his kitchen, placing his PLATE in one cupboard, and his BOWL in another, and the GLASS in a third.  I hope he was able to find everything.

Aren’t guys awesome in their minimalism?  Girls (MAGOO and AUBS!), take note.

Here’s a quick picture I snapped of his apartment:

Look at how laid back he is.  Bud was moving into an apartment with two strangers from a foreign land, and was as relaxed as could be.  And, yes, literally a foreign land.  His roommates are from Istanbul (not Constantinople — sing it with me!). 

I definitely miss having this big lug around — taking walks, Rock Band, forcing him to play Mario Kart with me, cooking his favorite foods, and using him as my personal slave when I needed a little muscle on one of my many projects.  Really, the kid needs to learn how to complain from time to time.  If he doesn’t his mother people will continue to take advantage of his generosity and gentle spirit. 

Oh my gosh, Bud is a Senior!  He just signed up for his last semester of college courses and is on track to graduate in four years with a degree in geekery.  Smart choice Bud, us geeks rule the world, you know. 

We miss him, and we are EXTRAORDINARILY proud of who he is and what he is doing.

Now, Bud, come home.  I cannot go another day without blasting your first place Mario Kart behind with a blue shell.

Love,

Mom

I received a text from Bud the other day asking “What celebrity do I look like?”  After seeking  a bit more details about his unusual request, it turns out he is on a team of students making a presentation about some software they are developing.  The team decided to use celebrity look alike photos to represent each of them in the presentation. 

But, I was of no help.  I couldn’t think of a celebrity Bud looked like.

In times when I have no answers, my default setting is to turn to my friend Google.  And, of course, Google came through.  In no time at all I found a site where you could upload a picture, and using face recognition software, it would provide you with the celebrities your features most matched.

Hehehehe.

Here are Bud’s results. I am not making this up, I promise.

Oh, my. 

I am still laughing about this one.  I immediately called Bud and sent him a link to his matches. Oddly, he seemed displeased with his top match.  I told him I didn’t feel bad for him…. but poor Andie MacDowell!!  Imagine if she was told she looked 73% like BUD.  Poor thing.

Hehehehehe.

And, as it turns out, Magoo – the girl with FACE BLINDNESS – against all odds helped her brother and suggested the guy from Fantastic Four, as a celebrity look alike for Bud.  Pretty good call:

But, there is another celebrity I’ve decided Bud resembles a little more closely:

 Hehehehe.

  And now I’ve insulted Andie MacDowell AND Goofy.  I’m a bad person.

Bud puts up with his mother’s Mario Kart obsession most of the time.  It’s not necessarily his favorite activity because (don’t tell him this or he’ll get a big head) he’s just too good.  We play at the hardest level possible and he wins 95% of the time.  There’s little challenge for him.

So, he’s decided to find ways to challenge himself.  Such as reversing which hand holds the controllers.  He still won.

The other night while Emmy was also humoring my obsession and playing Mario Kart with us, he decided to try this for a race:

The FREAK still won.  Annoying.

Next time, I say he plays with his toes.  Or, better yet, blindfolded.

This post is about Bud.  He is very limber.  Watch him do this all day long:

See that?  He doesn’t stop.  I’m actually guessing that if you keep watching, he will do those back bends for hours.  He is like a machine.

So I’m like an addict.  Even in a Bud’s Body Tricks post, I can’t resist bringing up Magoo.  Apparently, teasing her on this blog is my drug of choice.  Oh well, at least it’s legal.

Magoo took gymnastics lessons for like 22 years.  I think we started forking out money and time for her to become a gymnastic wonder when she was still in the womb.  I’m fairly certain that we could save the big three automakers from impending doom with the money we spent to give Magoo gymnastics lessons every week.  And, oh how it has paid off.  That girl can do one mean cartwheel… well, she’s a little rusty with the cartwheel.  But I’m pretty sure she can do a stellar somersault. 

So worth the sacrifice.

Go, Bud, don’t stop now!!  That guy is impressive.